Friday, 29 May 2009
-
Comfort Zone or Lesson on Contentment?
When is comfort not good and when is it an indication that I’m not learning to be content with where I’m at and my life? Right now, I find myself getting frustrated so much because I really don’t like where I’m at in terms of how I’m spendng my time. I go to work, I go home, I help set up the table for dinner, maybe wash the dishes, read something, prepare Sunday school, nothing especial. At work, I constantly think about what else I can do for fun after work or in the weekend. I’m constantly trying to figure out ways to make my life more interesting and experience more new things other than just going home. The reason I moved back home is to help clean up the house, but now I’m beginning to feel like there really isn’t anything else to help out. If there is something, it’s something small like we need to find the rod for the curtains or getting a shelf for the bathroom. I know saving money is an important and definitely allows me to afford a place of my own sooner, but sometimes I question is it really worth it to live a life where I feel like I’m not doing anything when I can afford to live outside even though it will have some inconveniences. It’s almost to the point where I don’t care about having a comfortable life because I know that’s not what life is all about. I want to have the experience and the chance to grow and take care of myself, and that usually involve me being in a situation where it’s not easy (or maybe that’s right now?). And moving out will also motivate me to meet other people and find a community of people where I can connect with, because I don’t have that here at home, not even with my parents. It’s weird how I didn’t have to adapt to living in South SF when I moved there but after I moved back home, I’m a lot more tired and I’m still in the process of adjusting to living back at home. At least, I have figured out some things I can do in Lafayette/Walnut Creek such as going to a local coffee place in the morning before heading over to BART for devo, and Wed night is my chill night since parents are at Bible Study, so I can hang out a bit in downtown Walnut Creek.
And about buying a place, I don’t even know if I’m ready to buy one. I’m saying that probably because I haven’t seen any places I want to buy (then again, I’ve only just started looking). My buget is small so that’s not gonna give me much options. And when I want to buy a place, I also want the location to be the place where I want to be for a couple years. So it’s a big decisions and a big commitment. I don’t even know if I want to live in the peninsula that long. But if I rent, I can just live there for a year or two. And if I don’t like it and I REALLY need to save money, then I’ll just move back home after the lease is over.
Sometimes I wonder is it just my attitude that needs to change, or do I need to learn take my feelings and dreams into account. I’ve never think about what I want, but always what I should do. There are priorities, and so far putting them first has given me joy, but living home so far hasn’t.
And I still feel like I’m all over the place…or don’t belong anywhere at all.
-
recommend
- recs 0
-
share
-
email
- sent 0
Post a Comment
- Back to dorkyfreak's Xanga Site!
- Note: your comment will appear in dorkyfreak's local time zone: GMT -05:00 (Eastern Standard - US, Canada)
Comments (8)
dang, i'm sorry you feel that way Lydia.
I don't know what kind of advice to offer, being that I too live at home, but I think for many of us, especially with the economy, this is a difficult phase in our lives when we're trying to transition into independent adults while at the same time trying to save money...and there's the whole predicament of not knowing exactly where we want to go and if we'll even like it once we get there :c/
I say, go with your gut feelings and whatever feels right for you in regards to where you wanna live, but otherwise, if you stay at home maybe change up your routines for some excitement in your life?
ok we need to talk. But first of all, I advice is that don't buy a place if you are planning to go back to school.
Are you planning to go back to school? Are you happy with work? Would you be happier with going to work (same job) and living in SF?
@kanfood - wah, lots of questions, but i can answer them quickly
Are you planning to go back to school? nope...well, if i do take some classes, most likely it'd be non engineering related (i.e. a language class :D)
Are you happy with work? yes
Would you be happier with going to work (same job) and living in SF? yes. I was happier living in South SF.
@jerzey13lover - thanks for your input! recently I did make some effort to change my routine a bit and it definitely makes life at Lafayette a bit more enjoyable. That's something I can do in the meantime. Being a young adult is so weird sometimes. I feel like i'm in a limbo stage. haha do you get that feeling?
@dorkyfreak - yes. Limbo Stage, hahah
yes. :)
great thoughts, missy~ you are an awesome young adult, and everything that you are feeling just comes with the territory-- because i feel it too. i often find myself thinking "what's my next step (big or small)?" and i believe it's just our hearts telling us that there is more out there. for me, the biggest worry is trying to find the best way to get to the next point. i've learned that it's scary making decisions that are life changing. but i want to encourage you to not be afraid to be 'right' or 'wrong'-- sometimes we're just asked to make a decision. obviously don't make any rash changes, but we (family and friends) are here to help you along the way. sometimes it's more about discovering your heart, your mind, your soul, than getting to the final destination. try to make the best decisions, enjoy the journey-- as weird as it may be--, surround yourself with people who love you and you love, and you'll get to where you need to be. i'll be praying for you~ :)
@placidchaos - thank you so much for your encouragement! "enjoy the journey" - that is definiltey something i need to learn as well. These past few years I have learn so much about myself that I'm beginning to realize that there's a side of me that I've never really know about. It's good reminder that I shouldn't be impulsive or make reash deciscions. =)
I'll have to agree that your job is quite interesting. Well then, just actively take steps to move to SF! :) You can, and will easily stay in one location for 2 years, or more.
2 years is nothing. It'll fly by oh so quickly.